Graduation weekend

Well, I'm all graduated. I don't yet have my degree (I still have one little ole class to take or clep test to pass.) Mom and Dad came in first thing Friday morning. We spent the day running around getting things for the party and just being together. Mom & I went to a concert together Friday night & had a wonderful time. (Don't worry - there was a basketball game on to occupy Dad.)

Saturday morning we got up & drove to the convention center, I registered, then Mom & Dad left to go find their seats. It was nice to see some former classmates & professors. It was also a bit strange and lonesome standing there, alone with my thoughts in a crowd of people celebrating. I missed Nate very much. Then the procession started - with a fife and drum corp. Nathan & I both very much loved fifes & drums. So, as the pipes are playing, I'm standing in line getting misty-eyed, knowing how Nate would have loved this. I pulled myself together enough to walk in and take my seat. The commencement exercises were lovely; the speakers were excellent. But the keynote speaker sent me over the edge at one point.

She was talking about her father, who passed away four years ago, and the time he was in the hospital as his time approached. Though she was struggling to see him in his condition, he was encouraging her and giving her strength. He called her to crawl up on the bed and lay her head on his shoulder. That brought back such a flood of memories for me of my time with Nate - curling up next to him in his bed at the hospital; falling asleep that last night while sitting in my chair pushed against his bed with my head resting on his shoulder. That made me lose it. The tears start to flow. But this is still before the walk across the stage. I fought to compose myself so I wouldn't cry too hard. I didn't mind the tears falling. I did not, however, want the mascara to run so much that I looked like Alice Cooper as my name was called and I crossed the stage in front of all those people. I managed to get through the rest of the ceremony without major incidence (i.e. tripping on the stupid gown or anything.)

I met up with my parents, as well as Nathan's grandmother & step-grandfather afterwards. I thought it was so precious that they came to the ceremony. We visited for a bit, then headed out. Once in the car, the waterworks started and this time, I didn't care. Mascara or no, I let the tears fall as they may. I touched the rings on my chain, reached back & clung to Mom's hand, and just cried for a moment. I know Nathan was with me. I know Nathan is proud of me. I know Nathan loves me. The day was certainly more sweet than bitter, but I missed getting to see his bright blue eyes smiling at me. I also couldn't help but think of my grandfather (Mom's dad) to whom education was so critically important. I know he was proud of me, too.

It was nice to have people dropping in and out over a couple of hours to say hi and wish me well that afternoon. Then the three of us went out for a celebratory dinner, which was fabulous. We walked around the Plaza for a bit, then came home and crashed. Sunday after church, Dad & I hit the driving range for a bit. It was such a pleasure this weekend to have a great visit with both of them together & get some very cool one-on-one time with each of them enjoying different activities. In some regards, I am very much my father's daughter. In other ways, I am every bit my mother. And in some things, I am a quirky nut with traits no one takes the blame, I mean credit, for. I like that.

Overall, it was an excellent weekend that ended too soon.